Colun: Interracial dating is discussed among friends

  • Posted: 4/7/2013 9:18 PM
    6/1/2013 5:53 PM

The level of shallowness for some in our area reaches no higher than the depths of a kiddie pool.A close friend of mine and I were discussing interracial relationships. We went down the spectrum of nationalities, creating a list to determine whom, out of these groups, he would select to feel best bringing home to his parents.

The conversation arose out of the possibility of him dating a Latina. When I asked him why he would not, his response was, "Latinas are crazy."

OK, I completely agree. I lived in a house with three of them. I'm engaged to another. But, what does that have to do with involving yourself with one?

I found that response to lack something. I looked for a further explanation from the conversation.

Before we finalized the list, we discussed how it is not uncommon in our day and age to see many interracial relationships. In fact, I was telling him how I even see students - something different from our high school experience - broadening their relational horizons and choosing to court members of the opposite sex of different races or ethnicities. Their choices are not just along black and white lines, but really over every gradation.

It seems as though our culture as a whole is becoming more accustomed to these types of relationships. Some might argue that celebrities and politicians who have maintained healthy relationships despite racial or cultural differences has helped to spark the interest in the younger generation. However, I feel it is the opposite.I believe that our youth see people in a different light, and that, for the most part, if the light is beautiful or handsome, they are going after it. In areas, though, including our own, there is still a hesitancy to get to know someone relationally who is different.

The awareness to consider this type of relationship begins at a much more fundamental level. In my experience, those who date interracially or interethnically seem to lead a life filled with more travel or cultural diversions.

An example for me has always been the men and women of the military. When I think of interracial relationships, and many of the ones that I have known, there has always been a tie to the military. Either one or both of the members was stationed somewhere else and met someone that completed them. They just happened to look nothing like them.

After all of this discussion, my friend came to the conclusion that he would still have to go with a mate of similar race. For him, the reason was familiarity. He cited that they would have nothing in common. Even more, he though she would have a difficult time relating to his family.

He wouldn't even give it a try. From my experience, I couldn't imagine him regretting giving it a try.He did admit that he recognizes beauty is beauty, and being a dateable person is universal, but deep down, he needed to go with who would best understand him

.As reasonable as that explanation was, I still couldn't help but wonder if maybe he was just afraid of the newness or estranged to the difference.

My conclusion: Maybe he's not as shallow as a kiddie pool. He just chooses to use the pool he's most comfortable with.