Downtown developments: Womanhood makes it tough to beat envy

  • Posted: 3/30/2013 5:30 PM
    6/1/2013 5:53 PM

The second deadly sin on my list would be envy.

It is one thing I try very hard not to do, but I do envy that person who has the commercial kitchen in his/her home; you know, the Sub-Zero fridge and freezer, the Wolfe 6 burner gas flat cooktop, the deep fryers and, of course, the double ovens, the warming drawers and any other bells and whistles that one could put in a kitchen. Along with that, I envy the person that can walk into a grocery store and purchase whatever they want when they want without having to calculate how much they can spend in a month. Eighteen dollars for a duck is so out of my realm of possibilities, even though I long to experiment with duck confit.

Kitchen and food aside, the only other thing I admit to envying is the male half of our species. Most men can wake up in the morning, shower, shave, brush their teeth, run a comb through their hair, get dressed and leave in what probably takes, in total, about 15 minutes. We, as women can't do that.

Starting with the shower, one must shave every day, then after drying off, one must use a body moisturizer, a face moisturizer, an anti-aging cream, a cream to minimize the wrinkles, special eye cream and a lot more. Also, we must use deodorant for a regular day or a special one for stress days, and we must make sure it moisturizes the arm pits and does not leave white residue and a myriad of other requirements.

While the face is absorbing all the creams, we must get out the hair styling products: gel, lifter, hair spray and more. We must take time to use yet another cream for our feet and to make sure our toes look perfect if we are wearing open-toed shoes.

After the face has absorbed all of the cream, it is time to bring out the arsenal of make up: foundation, blush, setting powder, eyebrow stuff, liner, shadows, mascara and sometimes bronzer, depending on the season. Now, with hair and makeup done, it's time for teeth that must be whitened to the point of hurting someone's eyes when you smile (totally unnatural), then picking the right outfit, jewelry and shoes.

Men, in general, have it so much easier, and at night when they get home or are with their significant others, what you see on the outside is what you get. With a lot of women, what you see is smoke and mirrors, and one must wonder what goes through a man's mind when he realizes what he thought he had he actually doesn't?