Phragments from Phyllis: Growing up and growing in wisdom

Last Thursday, my babies turned 30. In the midst of all the excitement with the birth of Pearce, now 8 weeks old, and the subsequent changes in my life, I hadn't given it much thought, but now I've had a week to reflect.

From the time I realized I was pregnant with twins 30 years ago, life has been more complicated - but mostly in a good way.

The doctor didn't think those babies would make it into this world. I had a miscarriage the year before, and he was sure the same issues would lead to another. From the beginning, he said he knew what to do with one baby, but he wasn't sure the interventions available for the problem I had would work with twins.

But he didn't know two things: 1) I had read "The Power of Positive Prayer" just before Mac was born, and I had continued the practice with the prospect of twins, and 2) The doctor wasn't the one in charge here - God was.

Given the potential for a problematic pregnancy, things went rather smoothly. And I carried Cat and Liz nearly full term. (In reality, they probably were full term - That was something else the doctor and the sonogram disagreed with me on.)

On Feb. 7, 1983, at 8:03 p.m. Cat came into this world, weighing 7 pounds and measuring 19 ¾ inches, followed by Liz at 8:04 p.m. weighing 5 pounds 9 ½ ounces and measuring 18 ½ inches. (It's no surprise that Liz's daughter, Pearce, weighed 5 pounds 14 ounces and measured 18 ½ inches.)

My twins were incredible babies. I can say that now, looking at what some parents experience. They made it possible for me to nurse them for a year - Cat feeding for only about 10 or 15 minutes, and Liz for even less than that. They didn't sleep through the night for a very long time, but the night routine was so fast that it hardly mattered.

They began to develop their own personalities very quickly. I can remember someone stopping me, pointing to Cat and saying, "She must be the dominant one," because she was the one making the noise. I replied, "Oh, I don't know. I have a feeling the other one (Elizabeth), in her own quiet way is going to control things or else." And in many ways it was true.

They both have found what works for them regarding getting things done and, sometimes, getting their way.

Life was not always rosy - the late middle school and early high school years were challenging, to say the least. It took both girls some time to find their way, but they both graduated from high school with honors and both fared very well in college - with Cat going on to grad school and doing extremely well there, too.

Now, both Liz and Cat have good careers, finding their niche - Cat as a social worker at NHC and Liz in advertising. Cat thought she wanted to get involved in adolescent counseling, but she has found a path in eldercare. She has shown a knack for dealing with families and residents in a compassionate, but rational way. At the same time, Liz took her degree in English and has parlayed it into a successful career using her skills with words in the advertising world.

And I can say that both girls have managed to marry well. They seem to have just the right person for each of them. The funny thing is that, in many ways, both Scott and Vince are a lot like Tom - they are frugal without being miserly. They are funny in a wry, quiet way. They are both hard-working young men. And they both are proving to be good parents in their own right.

With now in the picture for both girls, I am impressed with what managed to rub off through their own childhoods and has influenced how they tend to their own children. Cade and Payton, and now Pearce are all very lucky to have the parents they have.

I am so proud of how my girls have turned out and how successful they have become in their lives. I am enjoying watching them raise their own children.

I must say that I am very blessed with all three of my children.

Of course, I have suggested they are going to have to do as I did - pick an age that they like and stick with it. It's already hard to explain how I could have 30-year-old twins (and a 32-year-old son) when I'm only 39, after all. (Jack Benny's got nothing on me - for those of you who know who he was.)

Happy Valentine's Day to all this week.